And yet, often when alone, he wondered: had McClintock been wrong, or had she ceased to care in that way? The possibility that she no longer cared should have filled him with unalloyed happiness, whereas it depressed him, cut the natural vanity of youth into shreds and tatters. Dreams of adorable infants danced through her head as she cradled blankets in her arms. The fact itself is regrettable enough—regrettable, I fear, is quite an inadequate word. In this state of knowledge you will be horribly, irrevocably, alone. His mother's scream seemed again to ring in his ears, and he was so deeply affected that, fearful of exciting attention, he was about to quit the sacred edifice, when he was stopped by the entrance of Thames, who looked pale as death, with Winifred leaning on his arm. ‘Why does this person say you are mad?’ ‘Because I am risking having my head blown off,’ Gerald answered cheerfully. I don’t feel it. You can go for a walk with Lucy.
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